Charlie's Day

Every time I pick Charlie up from school I ask him the same question: "What did you do today?" I am always greeted with the same answer: silence. He completely ignores me, his short term memory apparently not developed enough to answer this question. Until today.

I start with the usual, "Did you have fun today, Charlie?" as I get him buckled into his stroller. To my surprise, he answers with an enthusiastic "Yeah!" So I press on: "What did you do?"
"Stomp bugs!"
I look at him blankly for a minute, thinking I misunderstood him. "You did what?"
"Stomp bugs -- ants!" He demonstrates with his foot.
Nice. The first time my kid actually remembers his day enough to tell me about it, it was because he was snuffing out the lives of innocent creatures. Maybe I should go back to calling him Charlie Manson after all.

Missing Daddy?

Mike is in New Hampshire for the night, taking a much deserved break from Daddy-dom since I worked much of the holiday weekend.

He just called me a few minutes ago wanting to know why, when he pulled out of the driveway, was I laughing as I held a sobbing Charlie in my arms?

It was because Charlie was bawling, pointing after not Daddy, but the car: "My car! My car! Waaant myyyy caaaaar!"

Marathon Hair Appintment

Have you ever scheduled an upcoming hair appointment and been told by your hairdresser to pack a lunch?

I now have.

Saturday August 16th I will be arriving at my salon bright and early at 10am and will be done by 5pm.

Why, why you ask? Other than the fact that I am completely crazy?

Because, in addition to the 3 hour process of dyeing and highlighting my hair that I will be undergoing, I will also be trying something new and exciting: the Coppola Keratin hair straightening technique thingy. Which the brochure swears will allow me to shower at night, let my hair air dry, and then roll out of bed every morning for the next 4 to 6 months with perfect hair. In addition, the keratin protein that they use to achieve this miraculous event will seal in the just-colored-highlights and leave me with long lasting shiny color.

How much will this life altering event cost?

I didn't even ask.

Happy 4th of July!!

My Diet

Breakfast: Cream of wheat with skim milk.

Lunch: Low fat string cheese, an apple, a 4 oz organic yogurt, exactly one serving of mixed nuts, and a diet Coke.

Afternoon Snack: A banana.

Dinner: A big Mac and french fries.

Hmmm I am thinking dinner needs a little work. So does the Ben & Jerry's ice cream I am about to have for dessert.

Charlie's Ideal Pet

The other day Mike asked Charlie, "Charlie, do you want a doggy?"
Charlie replied, "No doggy -- No doggy -- Elephant!"
I thought kids were supposed to dream about having a horse.

The Kindness of Strangers

This afternoon while taking the train home from daycare, Charlie kicked me.
ME: No kicking, Charlie.
CHARLIE: Haha! (Kicks me again.)
ME: (sternly) NO kicking. You do not kick people, understand me?
CHARLIE: Hahaha! (Kicks me again.)
ME: (yet more sternly) Stop -- you do not kick. Are you all done with Baxter? Mommy is going to take Baxter away if you kick one more time.
CHARLIE: Noooo! (clutching Baxter the bunny to his chest.)

At this point the train arrives at our stop and I mercifully don't have to carry out my threat. As I lug Charlie off the train a woman approaches me on the platform.
WOMAN: How old is he?
ME: He's two.
WOMAN: I have a 13 month old and it is just starting with him.

Thanks, lady, for letting me know that I and my unruly child were the center of attention on the train...